The · Missy · Avenue

since it was annouced at the meeting the other day,
there has been many people asking me this question here and there.
well, i have thought bout it before, but i have always put it behind me head because the possibility is almost impossible
i am but of course affected that he's leaving
who has always been playing a father figure to me in the company
though sometimes we share a love-hate relationship with him
but its just like what qi say 'i cant imagine a ps without R'
me too
tears were close to rolling down when the fact was finally thrown at us
that impossibility among the possibilities
he who offered me a job right after poly grad
who took good care of me all these while;
making sure that i m being taken care of,
even when he was away in china last year.
driving me home after late working nights,
constantly finding out if i m handling too much stress,
prepared a bday surprise for me,
trying to accomodate my studies schedule,
and of cos, all the things that he has taught me all these years, parttime,fulltime,parttime
but
after a talk with him on that particular day
telling me his thoughts, his reasons,
i respect his decision and of course, am supportive towards this decision that he has made
afterall, its not a decision that someone makes overnight
he, needless to say.

and even though he s leaving,
he s still part of the reason i m here
bcos i have to make sure that all his efforts these years
are still made to good use, and i cant let L and M fight the battle alone
its not the passion,
but its what its to be part of ops

thank you ray. you ve been a fantastic boss.

Current Mood:

calm

Cant help but lament on how fast time seems to fly.
its october thirty first again,
though no more bloody nurse and sptting blood qipao madame
and though i had a very tragic halloween last year
losing my handphones and stuffs at st james,
it was still a memorable experience
pretty sure there ll probably be many edwards and alices out there this year.
but while twilight is taking place at another part of the night,
i cant seems to escape from books this year.
cant seems to understand why my 4 papers are happening on 2 weeks
and i still have 3 more to go the coming week!

individual assignments results are out and i guess its pretty well done
with a credit, distinction and HD.
motivates me to study even harder for the exams
have been spending my past weekends in the school library with bf
muggin-love and hate relationship
but tonight has been an extremely cold night
library has death-freezing airconditions and the torrential thunderstorm going on outside
i was actually craving for a dose of baileys then
but we pulled through
and i m home right now watching my saturday night fever
east of eden

and i ll be back to my books again!


and. i ll be back soon! :)
 

Current Mood:

cold

the feeling to leave seems to get stronger everyday,
though ve been feeling it two months back,
but all these while, i have never really wanted to leave as much as i want to now.
its like the flea story, i have jumped and hit and the cap.
i cant go further unless i get myself out of the capped jar.
maybe i should really start thinking bout my next course of direction when hols come.
maybe its time i abandon those emotional baggages.
dont u think so?
time to walk the thought*

life has been a lil too fantastic these days. too good to be true. :)

Current Mood:

calm

Sometimes i just feel like shouting ' CAN YOU ALL JUST SHUT THE F UP'
CAN THE EFFING PHONE STOP RINGING
CAN I JUST EFFING HAVE ONE NIGHT OF QUALITY GOOD NIGHT SLEEP MINUSING ALL THE TENSION AND STRESS
CAN I JUST BLOODY CHUCK THE PHONES SOMEWHR, THROW THE LAPTOP DOWNSTAIRS
SHUT MYSELF IN THE ROOM AND BLOODY HAVE A GOOD REST

I DONT WANT JUST IN BETWEENS TRAVELING TIME TO REST
I DONT WANT TO WATCH THE TV IN BETWEENS PROJ DOING
I DONT WANT TO SPEND BLOODY 5 HOURS WORKING, 5 HOURS STUDYING, 5 HOURS DOING PROJ A DAY
 

I JUST FUCKING WANT TO REST.

pardon' me.
something inside is escalating.

Current Mood:

aggravated

school and work has really been hetic, esp this month. work, school, work, school.
it keeps alternating.
this is how my routine day would go: morn go office, go school from office, reach hm 8+, starts doing proj from 11 till the wee hours
and the other routine: i have no school, i spend 1 entire day at work, reach hm 8+, starts doing assignment from 11 till wee hours
sometimes, i just feel like playing prank both sides (and this is when qi plays a very big part to keep me gg)
and of cos, i m constantly telling myself that i do not want to be label as a "strawberry tribe"
no matter how tired i m, how many times quitting the job comes into my mind,
i tell myself i ll have to survive this.

but my proj mates have been a lovely bunch,
and in fact this whole week has been a very get-to-know each other week.
though we squabble all the time with jake,
but we all get along very well and we have been quite objective during the intensive proj meetings (though sometimes we digress,haha)
and we are slowly warming up and opening up to each other,
and i m beginning to understand some whys. :)
but still, we are feeling the stress coming from all directions; 4 projs submission in 4 weeks! urgh
we ll get thru this! :)
 

My sister defines this theory as the example of an athelete,
who ran 3km a day for 10 days but decided to ran 4km on the 11th day,
and subsequently breaking her breaking points;
where you pushed yourself to the extreme to see how far you can go,
and once you break you breaking point, you realise you could actually go further, gradually.

School has been relatively heavy,
maybe its bcos i make it a point to revise the lectures again in the night,
and we ve been really kiasus about the group proj and indiv proj.
after last wed at starbucks with brian and qi, going through DC again,
we realised she was merely going through the framework with us,
we basically had 90% assumptions and hypothesis w/o grounds.

and work has been okay.
but i thinks it gonna get heavy when we relocate,
and the journey, from tpy to macpherson to tpy to clementi.
i guess i ll need plenty of redbull to break my breaking point.

as for playtime,
its not lacking as well,
but perhaps it would be better if i could get more sleep everyday.:)
 

Current Mood:	blah
Current Music:	MJ-Billie Jean